Wedding Bell Blues

Carter is stressed out. He told me that he can't marry me because I'm already married. He can't marry Grayson because she is his cousin. And on top of these horrible let downs, now Bella-Claire says she won't marry him, either. I have tried to tell him over the last couple of weeks that he has 25 years to think about who he might marry. I reminded him today that he's only 4 and no one ever finds out who they're going to marry at 4. He remained sullen and muttered, "I guess I'll just have to be a fireman." Apparently, firemen don't get married.
When I told Nathan about Carter's plight at supper, Nathan said, "Oh don't worry about who you're going to marry Carter. When you grow up, you just worry about being you and God will make is clear who you will marry." Carter, mulled this over seriously for a second and replied, "I know God wants me to get married but I _just_ don't_know_who_."
Meanwhile, I'm sitting across from him biting my lips together and trying my hardest to be as sober and grave as the subject required. I asked him how he asked Bella-Claire about someday marrying him and he said he didn't ask her, he "just sorta told her." I explained that he should probably be patient and work on his delivery. I'm not sure why he decided Bella would be his new choice. Wait, don't get me wrong - she is one of the most beautiful little girls I've ever seen and she's sweet, too. But, he's never seemed especially attached to her before. They've been in nursery, Sunday School, and now pre-school together, so I'd say he is most familiar with her. I've put a picture of Carter and Bella up from a day last month when she came home after school to play with us.
Will has another tooth!! That makes 3, so only 4 more. I'm just now getting used to him walking all the time. I don't know if I'm ready for a fuller mouth look. Carter pronounced him "the cutest baby I've ever seen" and I whole-heartedly agree.
I guess I better go pray for Carter's future wife, now. *sigh*

The Perfect Storm

I've not written in awhile. As the title suggests, I've been in the path of the Perfect Storm. Or was I the perfect storm. *shrug* Both, I suppose. The last week in this house caused some serious introspection. That's always painful for the one in the line of self-awareness. But, I'm wandering into the philosophical and this is about reality.
Carter really is a super kid. I am lucky to have him for a son and humbled to be one to nurture his personality. Not that he's perfect -not by a long shot. But neither am I.
This past week was rather tumultuous and torturous. Will was cutting his two lower 1 year molars. Of course, I didn't know this information at the time. He cried and wanted constant attention. Accomplishing tasks was stifled by his pressing need for comfort. Well, sure. Two big, sharp bone like rocks are pushing through gums. But when you don't know that, it seems like there is something seriously and mysteriously awry with your little one. I spent most of the day watching him for any signs of distress that would prompt me to call the doctor. He had no fever. He would stop crying and act just fine if his express desires were strictly followed. Marshmallows, mandarin oranges, fruit loops - anything sweet - but don't give him any food that might actually be nutritious. Oh, and ice chips. After the third time he tried to hi-jack my ice - not the drink -I had a fleeting thought that he might be finally cutting one of the seven teeth that bulged under his gums. So, my house looked like Santa's workshop threw-up and Will was miserable and I was getting nothing done and it was really cold and no one was getting sleep at night because Will was miserable. After 4 nights of severely interrupted sleep, I looked and felt like a zombie. Well, I can only hypothesize about how a zombie feels but I bet this was close.
A bucket of water was accidentally spilled and this incident was the one the tipped my scales of sanity. Marbles began pouring out my ears. I lost my temper and then I felt guilty and embarrassed about the way I'd acted, so I began to sob. That probably scared Carter more than the temper. He asked me if I was okay. I told him that I was just sad and frustrated. He said "I need to be alone" and slipped into my bathroom. I heard him in there talking. My tears subsided as I accepted my mental and emotional breakdown and resolved to move forward. Carter reappeared and he began making faces and doing funny dances. I started laughing and said "Carter, what are you doing ??" He smiled really widely and said "Mama, I'm trying to help you feel better." I smiled bigger and said "Well, it's working!" Then I asked him what he was doing in my bathroom. I knew, but I wanted to hear what he said "I was praying for God to help you." I reassured him that his prayers worked and that I was feeling better. I told him I was sorry I lost my temper and he said "Oh, it's okay. I'm not upset." I was amazed at how my child was ministering to me - and not in just the incidental way we parents usually mention but in a deliberate way. The rest of the day was mellower but not happy. Will continued his painful march into the land of the toothed.
That night it happened. Will slept all the way until 6:30, then went back to sleep until 8:30. When I opened my eyes and realized that I'd had more than 2 consecutive hours of sleep, those crazy marbles began to find their way back. Will was being so pleasant, eating what was given to him and being playful, it was dream-like. Maybe I hadn't really awakened. But I had! I took him in to change his diaper and got a glimpse of his gums. He does not allow anyone to look at his gums. He's very private that way. I try to sneak peeks all the time and he catches on immediately and fusses at me. But this time, I was not to be denied. Two new little pearls poking through. I wasn't crazy! Will was just cutting his molars! It was relieving and oddly reassuring. Our home life made a dramatic turn around. How could two little teeth cause so much chaos and damage? Damages? One Swiffer Wet Jet gave his life. He will be sorely missed.

PS I just slipped upstairs to tuck Carter in for the night. He said "I love you because you are the best mama I ever met!" I told him that was only because he was the best kid I'd ever met. And it's true.

Everybody's a critic

Today was frustrating because Will has a cold and is cutting 7 teeth. That means he has lots of drainage and coughs a lot. He was constantly hungry but wouldn't eat much when things were offered to him. He really only wanted marshmallows. By 5:00 p.m., I was seriously tempted to relent and present him with the whole bag of stale jumbo marshmallows. As a result of his condition, he followed me around, whining and crying, holding on to my legs so I couldn't move and wiping his snotty nose on my knees. *sigh* I was so happy when he fell asleep easily.
Carter, by stark contrast, was so good today. He was obliging and low key. He has been struggling at big family parties. When we went to his grandparents Christmas family get-together, he immediately said he needed to be alone. He found a quiet place and stayed there for quite some time. It was good to see him back to his sweet self today. But while at the family get-together, he saw his oldest cousin Grayson (age 7) in the dress-up wedding gown and was transfixed by her beauty. Now, Grayson is already his hero. I'm not sure he's aware he has 3 other cousins most of the time. So, he promptly announced that he was marrying Grayson and proceeded to walk with her holding hands. Sure, it was a little embarrassing, but I was happy it was Grayson who said their cousin Clara Cate could be their first baby. I'm not sure Clara Cate was thrilled with that appointment. His cousin Baker tried to take Grayson's other hand and claim to marry her too, but Carter deftly fended him off and retained the bride for himself.
Well, and that brings us to tonight. He'd been helpful and loving all day. His little brother was asleep and we'd just brushed his teeth. I was lying on the bed and he comes over and hugs my legs, then announces, "When you change those pants, I'll hug you some more." I thought maybe they smelled like lime from one I had squeezed earlier. He doesn't like that smell. I asked why he didn't like my pants. That's when he explained, "I don't like them. They don't look good." I was stunned. I just sat there for a second. But, as usual, curiosity prevailed and I followed him to the kitchen and asked "What's wrong with my pants?" "Well, I don't like the squares and the blue." (they're a small blue plaid) "Really?"
"You're shirt is okay. I like that." (It's a gray sweatshirt) "Uhm. Okay. I can't believe you don't like the pants." "Sorry."
"I like these pants." "Well, I guess they're okay. I like blue. I guess squares are okay. I mean, they have four sides and I'm 4." I told him "No, no. You don't have to like them. It's okay." I don't think my clothing is supposed to be unacceptable to my child until he's at least 12.